Most people struggle to predict what makes them happy, says Harvard University-trained happiness expert Laurie Santos.
You might think a promotion or higher paying job will bring you joy and fulfillment, for example. That might be true if you’re struggling to pay rent — but as long as you have enough money to live comfortably, you’re more likely to feel happier if you can prioritize small daily health-conscious habits, like rest and social connection, Santos said during a live taping of interview series “Last Meal with Tom Nash” at SXSW on March 12.
If you forgo sleep, exercise or time with loved ones to reach your financial or professional goals, you’re gambling with your own happiness, said Santos, a Yale University psychology professor. You’ll become happy faster, maintain your positive feelings for longer and get more overall “bang for your happiness buck” by prioritizing those core parts of your life, she added.
“Material possessions, fame, professional accolades at work … We think those are going to be the stuff that moves the needle,” Santos said. “[But] we’re often pursuing that stuff at opportunity cost of the stuff that really matters.”
Goals related to your social, emotional and physical health are better for your well-being than anything that relies on other people’s approval, found a 2022 meta-analysis published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
Here are three easy habits scientifically proven to make you feel happier, according to Santos:
Gratitude journals
Writing down things you’re grateful for — whether it’s having a roof over your head, a reliable relationship or a hobby you find rewarding — can improve your happiness levels and even your physical health, studies show.
The longer you keep a gratitude journal, the more of a difference you’ll notice over time, Santos said in a free online course called “The Science of Well-Being for Teens,” which published in 2023.
Practicing gratitude for 15 minutes per day, five days per week, for six weeks can improve your mental wellness, found 2020 research by psychologists from the University of Twente and Eastern Washington University. The habit can also reduce stress, increase mental clarity and improve relationships, sleep, and mental health, other studies show.
Different strategies work for different people, other experts note. If journaling isn’t your thing, you can experience similar benefits from other forms of gratitude, like writing thank you cards, observing small acts of kindness from strangers or reflecting on when someone has shown kindness to you.
Sleep more—even just 20 extra minutes per night
Getting at least seven hours of sleep per night improves your brain performance, mood and health, and reduces your likelihood of heart disease and dementia, studies show.
“I actually think we could solve most of the mental health in college age students and high school students if we just forced [them] to get more sleep,” Santos said in the online course.
To improve your quality of sleep, she recommended relying on an alarm clock, so you leave your phone in another room while you rest. “I know there’s stuff to do … but if you can just get the right amount of shut eye, you really will improve your mental health much more than you expect,” said Santos.
Your physical health could benefit, too: Getting enough sleep is the No. 1 most important way to keep your body healthy over time, longevity expert Poonam Desai told CNBC Make It on Friday.
“It’s something we do every single day. It’s free. You have an opportunity to optimize it every single day,” said Desai.
Talk to acquaintances, friends and family in real time
Social media and text messaging can help you quickly connect with friends and family near and far — but it doesn’t give you the same mental boost as talking with someone in real time or, best-case scenario, face-to-face, Santos told the “Huberman Lab” podcast in December 2024.
“The two things that predict whether or not you’re happy … is how much time you spend with friends and family members, and how much time you’re just physically around other people,” Santos said.
Even briefly interacting with your local barista on weekly trips to the coffee shop can improve your happiness levels, whether you’re introverted or extroverted, she added. [add links from studies]
“It gives you a sense that your life is going better,” Santos said. “You feel less lonely. [Being social] has all these positive outcomes that we don’t expect.”
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